What might have been

Sometimes, when I’m in a reflective mood, I think about things that might have gone differently, or the road not taken.

Sometimes I think that if I had my time again, I might have decided to leave my home state of South Australia to go to Uni, most likely, given I always wanted to study politics, ending up in Canberra. Would things have been different? Would I have a different career trajectory? Would I have more like-minded friends?

Other times I think of what might have been if I hadn’t have done something out of the ordinary. If I hadn’t have heckled that administrator to give me the internship I desperately wanted. If I hadn’t have applied for that exchange program, given at the time travelling halfway across the world was well outside of my mental capacity. If I hadn’t have just jumped in and hoped it would all work itself out along the way.

But I also think of what I would have missed out on if I had chosen a different path. With any counter-factual, you have to interrogate the opportunity cost, not just the potential opportunities missed.

I wouldn’t live in close proximity to my family. I wouldn’t have made some amazing friendships that I have no doubt will last a life time. I wouldn’t have met my partner. I wouldn’t have got that internship that changed my career trajectory.

It is good to be reflective and, to some extent, good to evaluate things that might have been. But it's important not to paint the grass as too much greener on that road not taken. To do so might mean you forget to see how well things have turned out.